Relationships

 

"The way in which two or more people or things are connected,
or the state of being connected"

Relationships both personally and professionally are so important, they can take a long time to build and maintain, and can also be lost in an instant. 

But we need these relationships, we need the relationships that teach us about ourselves, the ones that challenge us to be better, like sandpaper smooths the timber we all have people who will help to soften our hard edges and those people that will love us and be true to us no matter what. 

My fav quote is 'People come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime', this is actually a poem and I have likely shared before, however I see this in my life and my friends more often as I am getting older. Everyone has their place in our story and the ability to move from perhaps a reason to a lifetime, we just never know. But as I am getting older (and maybe sometimes wiser) I am getting better at accepting, not holding on to what needs to be let go and enjoying those who stay on. 

Then today I heard Colbie Caillat's song 'Try' and it stuck with me all day, especially the line - Why should you care, what they think of you; When you're all alone, by yourself; Do you like you? Do you like you? - This is what is most important, if we don't like ourselves then that will flow across to our relationships whether business or personal. 

Are there times when I don't like myself, yes there are, when I am disappointed in decisions, actions, words, thoughts or just generally unhappy with where I am at, do I dwell here in those moments - I try not to, is it hard not to - yes! Thankfully, I like myself more than I don't and with age I am accepting who I am, my good and bad features and learning not to compare myself to others as it simply doesn't get me or us anywhere. 

A quote I saw today from Bill Gates was "Don't compare yourself with anyone in this world... if you do so, you are insulting yourself." and this was timely with the theme of the day. 

We are number one, just like on the plane when in the safety briefing they tell you to put your mask on then help others, if we don't love ourselves, don't believe in ourselves and look for outside validation then even if we get it from those relationships, it won't ring true.  We won't believe it even if we get it, as if we don't believe it in our hearts and head then others can't penetrate, do I battle with this - yes, but I think a lot do. 

I was told years ago 'fake it till you make it', that gave me confidence and made me realise that as long as I am confident no one will know any different, but you can only do that for so long and if you don't turn it into owning who you are, your experiences and your expertise then self doubt can set in and oh forbid impostor syndrome...  

So my thought for the night is to learn to love yourself (myself) the flaws, the imperfections, the good and the bad, recognise those areas that need working on and to be kind and compassionate to yourself (myself), this life is short and we need to not waste anytime thinking we are inadequate, we all have a far bigger purpose than that! 

Now, I have written this tonight as the thoughts have come to me, is this structured right - doubt it - am I worried - nope - why... because I like writing, I like getting the thoughts out and if it helps just one person, then I am happy.  Should I take a writing course, most likely...  But I am going to go with this makes me happy and I am doing it for a reason.